Communication and Professional Relationships Withchildren, Young People and Adults Essay

A key element of the role of any member of support staff in a school or other education environment, is communication, both with children and adults. Whilst it is important for children to learn cognitive skills, it is equally important that they also learn skills that will allow them to function effectively in society. A significant proportion of the latter can be attributed to effective communication, how individuals cooperate with others, and the relationships built both on a social and professional level. Support staff have a responsibility to act as role models for students, and it is therefore imperative that a clear understanding of effective communication and professional relationships is held. This study pack outlines the principles, skills and regulations that cover this topic. Principles Effective communication is the fundamental principle in building positive relationships (relationships which benefit children and young people, and their ability to participate in and benefit from the setting). In general, both children and adults are much more likely to co-operate and share information, if they feel you communicate openly and clearly. This is not limited to what you say but also appearance, body language, facial gestures and mood. In particular it must be remembered that you are acting as a role model, and the way you communicate is likely to be reciprocated in the same way. There are seven principles involved in building relationships: 1.  Effective communication – covers both formal and informal verbal, written communication, in addition to body language, facial gestures, physical contact and appearance, and the way these impact our interactions with others. 2. Respect – courtesy and respect should be demonstrated in any interaction with an individual (be it child or adult). Although you may differ in opinion, it is important to actively listen to others, and respect their view(s). The same consideration should be applied to individuals from different cultures, and their values/traditions upheld. For example in Germany professional interactions are much more formal and people are rarely referred to on first name terms, even if they are acquainted. 3. Consideration – be sensitive to others situation/position particularly when behaviour or reaction is out of character. There may well be an underlying cause you are not currently privy to . 4. Remembering Personal Issues – if you are aware of any concerns or upcoming life events, it may be worth enquiring about these, as it shows that you are interested, and is likely to benefit any relationship . You may be worries that an individual may not want to discuss any further, they can let you know if this is the case but it is probably still better to ask, than seem aloof or standoffish. 5. Listening – communication is a two way process. Therefore it is vital that you take time to actively listen to others, in order that they feel their opinions are considered. Active listening means that you hear another opinion but also demonstrate interest by responding appropriately (both verbally and with body language gestures). Listening is fundamental if others are to feel able to confide in you or ask for help/advice. 6. Clarity on Key Points – when giving information or instructions you must be clear, so that others can understand what you have said, or asked of them. Do not assume you have been clear, especially with children who may say they understand even if they don’t. Always ask them to repeat back to you what they have need to do, whilst reassuring them that you are not testing them but checking that your instructions were clear. 7. Sense of Humour – Particularly in times of stress or pressure, try to see the funny side of a situation. Not only will it benefit you ( temporarily reducing stress) but also releases tension from any situation. Although these principles can be applied to building any relationship, there will of course be differences or adaptations in the way we communicate dependant on the context of an interaction. It is inconceivable to think that the way we informally converse or behave in the company of friends would be acceptable in a workplace meeting. More formal language and behaviour would be expected in the latter, if one was not to be considered rude. The same would be true of any interaction with a parent in a professional capacity. As mentioned previously it is not just what is said or written but also gestures, body language and dress, which should be appropriate to a situation. Advice should be sought when dealing with individuals from different cultures, with particular attention to acceptable behaviour, gestures relevant to that culture, to avoid misinterpretation. What may seem perfectly acceptable to you, could be interpreted as extremely impolite to another culture. In summary you should consider who you are interacting with as well as the (likely) expectation of language and behaviour. In doing so you are less liable to avoid causing offence, misunderstanding or bad feeling; which all have a detrimental effect on any relationship that may have been fostered. Skills May of the skills involved in effective communication do not need to be learnt as we demonstrate them subconsciously. It is however valuable to understand what these skills are and evaluate our own strengths, weaknesses and areas for development. Give Opportunities to Speak – as with all beneficial communication but particularly in the case of children, it is important to allow and give opportunities for every pupil to speak and contribute. Every child is different, some maybe confident and particularly vocal whilst others may seem reticent. An inclusive environment should be created where every child has the opportunity to express themselves. Don’t be tempted to speak whenever there is a pause in conversation, as some children need time to process their thoughts and garner confidence to share them. Actively Listen – show you are listening by giving a child your undivided attention and maintaining eye contact. By doing this you are inadvertently saying your voice matters to me, which will only serve to boost self esteem, confidence and aid positive relationship building. Positive Body Language and Facial Expressions – body language and facial expression are another way to demonstrate you are listening. Nodding, smiling, talking/listening at a child’s level, all indicate you are interested in what they have to say, and can also make you seem more approachable. Folded arms, neutral facial expressions and talking down to a child can make you appear intimidating. React and Comment – Respond to the information a child gives you, this may involve repeating what they have said, to clarify your understanding. Adding your own responses will also add to the conversation and help extend it. Be Interested, Respond and Question – Demonstrate that you are interested in what a child has to say. One way to achieve this is by responding and the appropriate points and asking questions, which may further the conversation. It is also important that the child is given opportunity to ask questions and respond in the same way, so that they learn that communication is a two way process and you are equally interested in what they have to say. As adults it is easy to dominate dialogue, without intentionally meaning to do so, by not giving a child time to contribute, question or give their ideas, opinions or feelings. Children should be encouraged to question information and add their own ideas, therefore the school environment should promote this. Adaptation The skills discussed are however just a starting point and as with the guiding principles, adaptations will need to be applied dependant on the child’s age and context. Age Younger children will tend to be less independent so will rely more heavily on reassurance and positive reinforcement in your communications with them. Additionally younger children are often much more tactile and will seek physical contact as a source of reassurance and to build confidence. Younger children are generally more open and will seek adult help in times of distress, anxiety but also to share achievements. Consequently communication is much easier, as they will share information openly with you. As children mature, they become more self conscious and aware of peer pressure, often reluctant to share information and are therefore likely to require much more coaxing and encouragement to discuss issues and verbalise their feelings. Context Within the school environment you are likely to function in various capacities within your job role, learning support mentor, pastoral role, supervisory role (playground duty), teacher/peer support and confidante. Your style of communication will need to be adapted according to the situation. In a more formal setting, such as the classroom it will be necessary to provide clear, concise communication regarding tasks whilst simultaneously foreseeing and dealing with any disruptions, to ensure pupils stay focused on task. Conversely when acting in a pastoral role, active listening will play a greater part. Your language maybe less formal to engage the child and make them feel comfortable to share their troubles and feelings. The child may seek personal information from you in this instance; have you ever felt this way, has this happened to you? Whilst it ay be tempting to answer these questions openly and honestly, to give the child confidence to do the same, you should remember that a professional relationship must be maintained at all times. Show your understanding without giving too much personal information, it is important for the child to view you in a professional capacity not as a friend. Communication Differences Each child is an individual and therefore will have t heir own communication style and differences. If a child has SEN, these will be documented and it will be much easier to make adaptations according to their provision map or statement. However this will not always be the case and you will need to recognise and respond to any communication differences, a child may have. For example some children may lack self confidence, and ample opportunity must be provided for them to contribute. Don’t be tempted to talk for them or guess what they are trying to get across. This will only serve to compound their anxieties. You may feel it beneficial to work 1:1 building to small groups and further as a whole class to build their confidence slowly. Ask for help from your speech and language coordinator if you work with a child with a speech disorder, they will be placed to advise on strategies for working with a particular type of communication issue. As adults, our nurture instincts often lead us to step to help a child when they experience communication issues, which is not actually beneficial to the child. Allow them time to speak, support them (use of visual aids, sign language, providing an environment where they feel comfortable and confident), show sensitivity but do not try and be their voice. Communication needs The skills of communication apply equally to adults, young people and children and whilst there are many similarities and significant overlap in the way we communicate with these groups (active listening, body language, facial expressions, showing interest etc), there are also important distinctions that must be made. Children With children communication must be succinct, clear and concise, too much information can lead to confusion. They should be able to feedback to you in their own words, their understanding of your expectations from them. An inability to so demonstrates that you need to reconsider your choice of vocabulary appropriate to the child. Avoid using expressions or sayings that children may find vexing and interpret literally, particularly if English is not their first language. One such example would be referring to something as ‘the bee’s knees’, there is nothing in this expression which suggests something is good, so this only serves to confuse a child. Within the school environment, as a member of support staff you are functioning in a professional capacity, your choice of language should reflect this. A certain degree of formality must be maintained to ensure the carer- child relationship boundaries are clear. This especially applies to physical contact, which should not be promoted or offered. In a setting with younger children who seek this type of reassurance, this may be more difficult and you should not shun a child who tries to hold your hand or embrace you. They may interpret this as a rebuke and assume they have upset you. Conversely you should not be initiating this form of contact. Adults Communication difficulties are not exclusive to children. Adults may also experience issues, and it is important you apply the same sensitivity and adaptations, as you would with a child. Again some difficulties may be more obvious than others, hearing impairment, non-English speaking or English as an additional language (EAL), if you are meeting face to face, allowing you to adapt more easily. You should however consider the various forms of communication your school utilises and consider potential communication difficulties, adults may have that you are not aware of. Adult literacy is an issue , particularly in disadvantaged areas. Sending letters home in this instance would not be an effective method of communication. This could be something you should be sensitive and consider particularly if you feel an parent is taciturn. Simply speaking to the parent at the end of school outlining the content of the letter and politely asking for a reply may foster a relationship that allows the adult to work with you for the benefit of the child. Autism is another area that affects communication for both adults and children. Be mindful that you should adapt your communication style but what is suitable for a child maybe patronising and send out the rong impression to an adult. Equally do not assume any every person with autism will have the same, if any, communication difficulties and that you should consider the person as an individual rather than a minority group. Managing Conflict Typically most conflict arises due to a breakdown or lack of communication. Identifying and addressing conflict early is the key to resoluti on. However successful resolution requires sensitivity careful management of the situation. Open dialogue between affected individuals is the starting point of conflict resolution. Everyone should be able to discuss what happened (their interpretations of events) openly and freely ( show RESPECT). They should also be encouraged to describe their actions (take RESPONSIBILTY). Often misinterpretation of another intentions or verbal misconception are the cause of conflict. Equally others may be unaware of the impact of their own actions or communication style on others, particularly if there are cultural differences. Be mindful of external pressures or issues to which you or others may not be privy. External pressures, for example family breakdown, will have a significant effect on individuals, their way of expressing this may be uncharacteristic in terms of behaviour. In this instance it would be beneficial to talk to the child or adult individually and offer support, prior to involving others. Finally develop a plan moving to move forward (REPAIR the situation), which is satisfactory to all concerned. This approach forms the basis of restorative justice, practised in many schools and has been shown to proactively to build relationships, promote discipline and prevent harm and conflict occurring.